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Come with us as we make our way from Good Ole' Texas to fabulous Hong Kong, China.

Friday, January 21, 2011

What the hell is in my hair?

Hello everyone! And how was your week? Me? Well.........

Monday morning I woke up and my hair was damp. Apparently some little one had snuck into our bed in the middle of the night, got turned to where she was parellel with the head board between our pillows, and then of course, she wet the bed. Alas, my hair was wet when I woke up.

Now of course, I am a woman with a past and this is not the first time I have found myself with an undesirable substance in my coif! There was that party Senior year where some random date told me that Everclear was just like water, therefore drinking a 32 oz. Big Gulp cup of Trash Can punch is harmless. Ugh! That was the first and last time I ever partyed without a good friend willing to hold my hair for me as I ralphed.

Then of course, we all have the experiance where not so lady-like statements are made, such as "Wait, my skirt is caught in the car door" and gee, whatever your name was, I hope I can get back into the club, because my ride was still on the floor dancing when we came out here"

I'm kidding!!! Gosh, your a judgmental audience, aren't ya! Glass houses, remember!

Anywho...

So Tuesday night was Bookclub. There were about 10 ladies, the usual nice but also over educated, elitist, Ex pat wives. So, i am standing in the kitchen talking to two other ladies who were well traveled. Now, granted these ladies I have only met a handful of times, but you know, it doesn't take a Doctorate in Neurology to be able to determine certain things about people when you first meet or chat with them. Do you agree?

So, we are in the kitchen, and I ask the older woman, "Have you been to Dubai, I've never been, but we are headed there for Chinese New Year next week". So she haughtily replies, "I don't care for it, it's all new and shiny, with nothing but shopping, like one big fancy shopping mall!" She says this like it's a bad thing, meanwhile my eyes have ofcourse glazed over and drool has begun to drip down my chin. I mean HELLO, does she have no idea who the hell she was talking to? She says all that with that negative tone and meanwhile I am picturing heaven on earth where anything designed in Italy or France is on sale!!!!! The other woman there just took one look at me and started laughing hysterically, because obviously I looked just like Garfield when Lasagna comes out of the oven!

Later in the week, I read on Yahoo home page, an article called "Men weigh in on Woman's Fashion". These jackholes start giving us tips on what they like and don't like. I couldn't believe it! Guess what fellas, unless our main career task everyday is hanging upside down on a pole while bad 70's rock blares, WE'RE NOT DRESSING FOR YOU!!!! Everyone with half a wit knows that women dress to impress other women. Am I right ladies? I could care less what the guy at the freakin Walgreen's counter thinks of my top or my make up that day. It's what the Mom's at John Wesley think that matters! Then these ego losers go on to bash Uggs! My favorite shoes in all the land! I mean, really! They made a comment like "Please ladies, give these Uggly things back to the Eskimos you stole them from", I thought I was going to pass out! How dare these 20 something Bachelor show wanna be's dis my furry, fuzzy, cuddly, luvvy boots! Down with MEN! Argh!

So that was my week. Thursday we are headed to Hong Kong, Bangkok, Thailand, and ofcourse that big Glittery Mall that is Dubai. I will check in with you from there.

Much love from the People's Republic!

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